Saturday, February 25, 2012

Blog Neighbors

Sometimes I think I might just close up this blog. It might be a moment when I'm feeling particularly exposed, or feeling stymied by what I cannot fairly write here because it will infringe unreasonably on another's privacy, or because I know the thing I might be feeling will pass, and I don't want to put it out there knowing that as soon as I press "Publish" it will already be a lie, and so I don't write sometimes, the words just fill my head, a jumble of thoughts and feelings trying to find their way to light, and I wonder, why write on the blog if I can't write everything that arises in me, and then I pay visits to my blog neighbors instead, and I find Ms. Moon putting the Republican race in brilliant perspective and Tearful peeling back the meaning of the universe in a moment of hard-won domestic peace, and the Grady Doctor wrestling with hard and magnificent truths in painful counterpoint while Elizabeth explains how a day in the life of beautiful Sophie is made to work with the help of her extraordinary brothers, and my spirit brother Mark reporting that his application to sponsor his partner of 22 years, French citizen Fred, co-parent of the four most photogenic children on the face of the earth, has been denied, putting the appeal in motion, and Mel and Debra, in the same place I am, watching our baby chicks fly, and ellen breaking it down about why she's breaking up with Oscar, and Miss A in Brooklyn making it happen, day by day, not all of them easy, and really all of you, I could go on and on, but instead I'll just say that when I feel tempted to shut this thing down, I find myself here again, reading your words, feeling the great privilege of being privy to your lives, and understanding how much I'd miss you if I couldn't come here and be with you sometimes. I learn so much from you. I root so hard for you. You make me cry. You make me cheer. You remind me how far our connections are flung, and how very near.

15 comments:

  1. Yes. Yes. And Yes.

    Please don't shut down your blog. I need your wisdom and mentoring and here is where I find it. Much love and adoration to you, your own BHE, and those amazing children of yours. xo, Kimberly M. aka gradydoctor

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    1. Aw Kimberly. It's Kimberly! dang, i called you the wrong name. It was no indication of the love I feel for you and your wonderful family. Thank you for coming here, and being there, inspiring me always. Hugs.

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  2. Oh, you know I'd miss you so much too, Angella. You know I have loved following you and your family and your thoughts since you first started blogging, and you are a real, genuine friend to me, you are. When you leave me hugs and love on my blog, it doesn't feel virtual. :)

    One of these days you'll bring your daughter to the Wizarding World, or my husband and I will take another vacation trip to NYC, and we'll actually meet in person, I really believe that, and I look forward to giving you a big squeeze hug for real.

    And you know, it really is a community, I've recently started reading all the archives of the lovely Dr. Manning who commented above, and I was delighted to find that she is close bloggy friends with Ms. Moon, bless both their hearts. How neat!

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    1. ellen, i feel like we have a special something. you were here from the start, your heart wide open, encouraging me to keep going with this blogging thing, a friend so generous and willing to let me be whoever i happened to be that day. hard to explain, but it meant so much. you mean so much to me. and yes, what a community this is. absolutely real and true. hugs.

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  3. This is blogging for me, too. xoxox

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    1. maggie, your truth telling about marriage and family life keeps me going so often. and such beautiful if sometimes wrenching writing! thank you for being so brave and loving and true.

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  4. No, don't shut it down! I know I'm the worst blogger ever, but I'd certainly miss you and your words here! Hang in there!

    :o) BJ

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  5. Please don't leave. Go private but don't leave. You of all people saved me. Really. You gave me faith when I had no desire to go on.
    Take a break, but don't go.`
    Thanks

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    1. Miss A, you are such a good soul. Thank you. The truth is, I want to hang around.

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  6. blogging is therapeutic. don't ever give it up

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    1. hey C, i'm not going anywhere. as you say, this is therapy. there is a whole world here that is mostly kind.xo

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  7. I feel very much the same. In every way. I think what's hard for me is my family (eek) reads my blog sometimes and I have to remind them that it's for me - I do it for me and the things I say aren't things I would normally tell them or anyone - yet it's a strange thing that those things that I don't want to tell anyone wind up on my blog...
    xoxo

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  8. Oh, but please don't ever! It has been many weeks since I've had the opportunity to visit here, but it is a place where I know I'll find words of hope and beauty and all sorts of other things that make life real and worth living. I count on this place to remain, among the other places where my mind reaches out to seek comfort...

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  9. You are a writer . You need to write... if not here, elsewhere. But here too please?

    ( and I share so slanted , sometimes I'm not sure 'what' I do. inspire? At least that I hope. )

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