Sunday, July 17, 2022

Hearts wide open


Could be I’m so worn down by the relentless bad news cycle that all I really feel like recording here right now are moments of light, evidence of the persistence of joy. We definitely experienced such moments yesterday afternoon, on the occasion of the bridal shower for my soon-to-be daughter-in-law. She was absolutely radiant in white, alternately laughing and crying as she greeted everyone who had gathered to celebrate her. Her good tender soul, sparkling wit, and loving spirit were a whole mood.


The gathering of beloveds happened at her parents' home in New Jersey, arranged by her three maids of honor (my future daughter wisely believes that more hands make for lighter work). We women did our womanly rituals under a tent set up in the back yard, while the men sat inside the family room eating pizza and watching a movie. Outside, the women told stories and played games, and imparted whatever bits of wisdom we could share with the bride to be. I contributed what I often offer on these occasions now, ever since I read about it on Mary Moon's blog when her daughter Jessie was getting married: that we will be married to many different people over the course of a lifetime, and if we can find a way to appreciate and love the good in each evolution of our partner, all will generally be well. 



Eventually, as the festivities wound down, the men joined us outside, and my son and his love indulged us in one more game, a quiz with random questions like who said I love you first, who is the better cook, the better dancer, who is more organized, more competitive, has more shoes, is more romantic, and so on. We all voted the answers and then my son and his love told us who was right, and there was much debate and laughter involved. My favorite photo from the day was taken during this interlude, it's the one up top, so much love and joy evident in the lovers at the center of this beautiful day. 


Here's another photo, this one of our two families, soon to be joined in the eyes of the law, already connected by the love shared by our children, and for each other, too. Our son and his betrothed found each other seven years ago now, so our two families have had some time to get acquainted. How utterly blessed we are in the people our children have chosen, the families with whom, if we continue to be lucky and touched by grace, we will share grandchildren. As my daughter observed of my son's fiancée's parents, "They're so pure." And they are. Hearts wide open. I pray with my whole being that our young people will be very happy through all the journeys of a lifetime, bolstered by acceptance, forgiveness, and ready laughter, and sustained by love. 



17 comments:

  1. Congrats on the wedding. These pics reveal a very happy spirit!

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  2. Can't say it enough. What love has given to us, no one can take away. It is a joy to see the love between your son and his beloved being celebrated in this way.

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  3. Your son often looks serious in photos, in that top photo, he looks like his true self. In the group photo, he looks like his dad. Glad you all had a wonderful time.

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  4. you know, those balloons look very like eggs!
    Symbolic?

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  5. Such a happy group of people. Joy really does shine through.

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  6. Thank you for sharing the light. I wish your son and his fiancee a long and happy union!

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  7. Glorious photos. I just love your wonderful, joyous family. Many years of love and happiness to the soon-to-be newlyweds.

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  8. It's so good to see such joy in this crazy world. I love what Ms. Moon says. There is such wisdom there. Peace and love to all! Tara

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  9. You son and his love are a beautiful couple. They are meant to be and their happiness and love shows in each and every photo. A joyous day for everybody..

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  10. This is so beautiful in every way. So much love and joy. Your son and his bride-to-be have found each other and their love brought two families together with all that love. Truly beautiful.

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  11. Such happy photos of your beautiful family, and family to be. Thanks for sharing the love.

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  12. Looks like a lovely celebration. Wishing them a long and happy life together!

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  13. This just makes my heart so happy! The radiance of everyone, especially the bride and groom to-be. Their love for each other reflects out onto all and I see true happiness and joy. What a most fortuitous meeting theirs was. Thank you for remembering what I said when Jessie got married- I had forgotten saying that! But it is true, isn't it? And some of our stages of evolution are easier to live with than others but...there is that bond made of love that helps us see through eyes of gentle acceptance and appreciation.
    Oh! I wish all of the joy in this world for that couple!

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  14. I'm with you. Just can't write about all the horrible stuff right now. And what a wonderful way to put all that out of mind. They and you are so lucky. So much love and joy. My advice is more pragmatic...always have an escape fund (which can turn into a vacation fund). That was the only advice my mother gave me. It must say something about her experience though my parents were married until death. I also offered this bit to my son-in-law who was thinking about moving out when he came to tell me...everything is temporary, the good and bad, the happy and unhappy. This will pass, it will get better. He stayed and they are still together.

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  15. They are very beautiful young people and I wish them much joy. And many years to evolve together. The last shower I went to was for a baby - she will be the best dressed infant in Lanark, for sure. Teenie onesies in piles. And a lot of fun and games. I love showers and I love your photos of the fun.

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  16. You look so beautiful and I love your jacket! Sending a hug.

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  17. What beautiful families, brought together by love.

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