Speaking of being conditioned, the candidates on the right are promising us fascism if they win, and a bloody siege if they don’t. They are promising purges of government personnel and military round ups and concentration camps and deportations and executions of enemies—yes, they’ve used these actual words—and yet the race is still deadlocked. How can this be? Now Trump is planning a huge Madison Square Garden rally in New York City to echo the Nazi rally of February 20, 1939 that took place there. The man is telling us everything we need to know about what’s coming if he wins. It will be enough of a hellscape if he doesn’t win but at least then we’ll have a fighting chance to slay this beast of evil at last.
I’m traveling to Los Angeles this week to start work on a new book project. I’m as anxious as can be at the mere prospect of packing, during which I will have to contemplate every occasion of showing up. I have only vague clues as to what strands of my history converged and tangled themselves such that I should feel this way. I confessed to a friend yesterday that it feels like a mental illness how excruciating it is just to make myself appear. She understood completely. I hate that she also struggles with this conflicted sense of being but in that moment, she reached out a hand to me, graciously and without judgment, and I felt comforted, seen.
Waving and loving you all from the rainy north XORebecca
ReplyDeleteFlying to LA gives me the heebie jeebies- I call that mental wellness. Safe travels dear heart!
ReplyDeleteWhere did you find a man who cooks and arranges flowers?
ReplyDeleteYou may be nervous about traveling to LA but I also know that you'll rock it. You are smart, you are hard working, you are beautiful, and you can write. You got this.
Starting something new brings unknowns and that causes nerves. I find the nerves settle and things move successfully. Only to ask, "Why was I concerned, not sleeping and feeling the jitters?" Safe travels. I hope you enjoy some warmth and sunshine too.
ReplyDeleteWishing you a wonderful experience in LA, you will be fine, you are a pro.
ReplyDeleteThose are lovely flowers! What a beautiful way to celebrate your rector.
ReplyDeleteI voted already and so can only wait to see what happens, while encouraging others to Vote Blue! I travel to Houston next weekend to visit my son, DIL, and grandkids but I do get anxious about the flights. I wish Safe Travels for both of us!
You'll do fine. You wrote the book on KBJ, you can do anything. The upcoming election is sucking the marrow out of my bones, I just can't stand the thought of four more years of that man. Safe travels! We voted today, put them in a drop box in front of the library, gotta love living in a blue state.
ReplyDeleteYour husband has an artist's eye for his flower arrangements. His color combinations are exquisite.
ReplyDeleteAs always, I appreciate your willingness to write about the emotional difficulties you face each time you begin a new project. I don't underestimate how challenging that part of your work can be. Good to have a friend who understands completely.