Thursday, May 2, 2019

The faces we wear

My girl and I took a selfie together at the orchid show this weekend. As far as photos of me go lately, it's one of the kinder ones. Still, this is me on the eve of three score and two. What I notice most is that aging is always very visible in the neck area. Also, I've always been the slightest bit cross-eyed. Aging sucks, y'all. And it turns out I am more vain than I like to admit. I try to only take pictures now from angles that obscure the chin and neck. I'm far more distressed by the visible signs of the accruing years than I thought I'd be back when I was my daughter's age and asking sanctimoniously, "Why would anyone ever do plastic surgery? We should be proud of the faces we wear." Well, I'm not off to do any nips and tucks, I'd be too scared of a messed up result, but let's just say I don't ask that question with the self righteousness of youth any more. And in a particularly cruel irony, waiting till the age I am to finally lose a bit of weight only results is more sags and bags. Just being honest with myself here, which is really my way of trying to be at peace with the face I wear.


  1. A lovely double portrait! May we all be at peace with the faces that we wear. If only we could see ourselves with the eyes of those who love us exactly as we are. I remember looking in the mirror when I was about 7 years old and thinking that I was beginning to get wrinkles around my eyes! Where does that kind of thinking come from? As I approach age 70 this October, I feel more and more at peace with my face and my body. I appreciate your honesty. I know how painful it feels when I am ill at ease with my face and body.

    1. am, we are so much in the soup of popular culture. no one really looks like the impossible beauty ideals we see in mass media, not even those people, who are airbrushed and pinched and lengthened. I know this, and yet I always have to remind myself of it. Maybe by 70 I will be able to join you in greater peace with myself. Or maybe this ill at ease thing is just who i am, and is internal rather than external. i'm beginning to wonder. xo

  2. Ah, so glad to see this post up again! It's a beautiful capture. I have solved the problem of not liking my photos by not having any taken, and only looking in a mirror if I am smiling first. A smile does wonders :)