Saturday, September 25, 2021

I want to go there

 

My son came to spend the day with me on Thursday, called me as he was getting off his overnight shift at the firehouse to ask if I'd be home, and if so he would hang out for a while. I love when this happens. I always know he's going to put something on the TV then curl up on the couch and go to sleep, while I work at the dining table, happy to be able to look over and see him there. I probably talked more to my daughter on video chat while he was here than I did with him, as he was mostly dozing. Meanwhile my girl was giving me decorating ideas for the living room refresh, lovely ones, as she's in her 20s, and still very plugged in to her design preferences.

I'm not ignoring the news, the men on horses at the southern border whipping desperate, refugee Haitian families and driving them into the river. The tragedy of the missing all American princess, her body now found in the wilderness, her disappearance ruled a homicide, highlighting all the other missing persons who were not blond and white, and about whom law enforcement and the press did not care. Arizona spending millions on a vote recount and finding no fraud. The ongoing debacle that is Congressional procedure, where one or two assholes can destroy any worthy endeavor. I'm not ignoring it. I just don't have the emotional resources to write about any of it right now. I am scraped bare by the relentlessness of the news cycle.

I've decided to risk going back to choir this fall. Everyone is required to be vaccinated and we will sing through masks. We won't hold the customary end-of-term concerts, we'll just gather and sing for the joy of it. The group will be small, 17 souls compared to the usual 30 or so, and only one of my four dear friends who are usually in the group will be returning. But another friend is going to try it out, see if she wants to join. She is a neighbor I have become close to in the last two years, with whom I sometimes sip flavored seltzer or wine on her terrace while watching the afternoon light shift into evening. 

We first met years ago when her son and my son were young and used to play with other kids in the courtyard, and we'd sit on the benches watching our boys while bemoaning their resistance to homework. Our sons are now full grown, hers is married, and she has two lovely granddaughters who live in my building. Though I had often seen her and her husband going on walks together, and thought how cozy and together they seemed, she has since amicably divorced and now lives in a light and airy apartment two buildings over. It turns out even without homework-allergic sons in common, we're very simpatico.

The book writing is going very slowly. I have had to adjust my 1,000 words a day target to a minimum of three solid paragraphs a day. If I achieve that, I consider it progress. I really am picking my way, figuring out the path as I go. I realize I've been telling myself how hard this had been, and maybe it's time to decide it can be easy. It's worked before! The photo up top is of a room at Jake's Treasure Beach, a place on Jamaica's south coast that I have yet to visit, but in whose gauzy serene spaces I yearn to be. Can you imagine being able to awaken to that turquoise sea and spend the day writing and dreaming there? 

*Whispers, this can be.


11 comments:

  1. I love that your son came for a visit and napped cozily on the couch while you video-chatted with your daughter. Ah the true love of family time.
    All the news, all the headlines I choose to ignore. It's not like me to just turn away, but lately I feel overwhelmed by all of it.
    That view is beautiful.
    And yes, this can be. Yes.

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  2. It's enough to have them in the house. I'm not writing about the news either. it's too depressing to see all the ways we are failing as a nation, like you, don't have the emotional energy to delve into it even though I am aware. I'm so ready to be somewhere beside this little rural town in Texas. some place on the Caribbean would be perfect.

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  3. I would like to be in the south of France with a view of the Pyrenees. It's so lovely there. Or I could be in Italy in a small hill town. I'd like to be anywhere but the US right now. The absolute stupidity of the republicans is wearing me out. I'm not following it much right now.

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  4. Yes. This can be. I know this to be true. Moving forward and being moved forward in these bittersweet times, looking out to the faraway nearby ocean always in our hearts.

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  5. I would love to visit Jake's Treasure Beach. Perhaps one day. I've shortened my travel list, trying to reduce my carbon footprint but the Caribbean is still one place I want to go.

    The news here is terrifying, out of control fourth wave of Covid. Perhaps covid is a little like bleach in the gene pool at this point.

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  6. I'm glad you're restarting choir. Jake's looks pretty dreamy!

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  7. That photo is so inviting. The simplicity and the richness of the colours is stunning. I hope you can get there by and by.

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  8. Gosh that is a lovely place to stay! Look at the blue of the water peeking through those windows! Glorious!

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  9. The room at Jake's Treasure Beach looks perfect. Now I want to go too! The room is very light and airy with a beautiful tropical sea view. The perfect respite.

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  10. Yes, I can imagine waking up there, going to sleep and smelling the ocean air and the frangipani and listening to the sounds of the tropics.

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