It is sunny this late afternoon in the UK. I have laundry drying on the washing line after days of what felt like constant rain. Your post yesterday has struck a chord with me - I have long standing fears of abandonment and low self worth - as a retired Psychologist I understand the theory all too well -but the lives experience is very different , and I agree IF we could change our response , we would . Since my husband died in March ( far far too young at 63, from a aggressive cancer that was merciless ) I have found each day a struggle - and am fast coming to the conclusion that there is not a lot of point in my remaining in a life I do not want and did not choose My therapist suggested practicing gratitude for the life my husband and I had together - and whilst my intellectual head nods and says yes , my heart wants to shout no - and that it’s ok to rage against the dying of the light ( with apologies to Mr Thomas ) This is an inarticulate way of saying it is “ okay” to feel what you feel . To be sad, cross , confused , withdrawn- and any other term you want to apply . You are okay . You are enough Mary x
It makes my heart happy to know that when you look out your window you see so much green.
ReplyDeleteHope you are having a better day today!
ReplyDeleteif I had to live in a high rise I would want that view.
ReplyDeleteIt is sunny this late afternoon in the UK. I have laundry drying on the washing line after days of what felt like constant rain. Your post yesterday has struck a chord with me - I have long standing fears of abandonment and low self worth - as a retired Psychologist I understand the theory all too well -but the lives experience is very different , and I agree IF we could change our response , we would . Since my husband died in March ( far far too young at 63, from a aggressive cancer that was merciless ) I have found each day a struggle - and am fast coming to the conclusion that there is not a lot of point in my remaining in a life I do not want and did not choose
ReplyDeleteMy therapist suggested practicing gratitude for the life my husband and I had together - and whilst my intellectual head nods and says yes , my heart wants to shout no - and that it’s ok to rage against the dying of the light ( with apologies to Mr Thomas )
This is an inarticulate way of saying it is “ okay” to feel what you feel . To be sad, cross , confused , withdrawn- and any other term you want to apply . You are okay . You are enough
Mary x
I'm hoping this view is nourishing you. You are an amazing and talented woman. Sending hugs. xo x0 N2
ReplyDeleteI hope it was better today. It's so remarkably greeeeeen there.
ReplyDeleteA great view!
ReplyDeleteSuch a wonderful view, the combination of trees and buildings is really interesting.
ReplyDelete