Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Stop the Deportations

This is the story of a family I have come to love and feel moved to champion. They are a same sex married binational couple who have been together for 22 years and who are the legal parents of four beautiful children, ages six to eleven. But while the law recognizes their rights as adoptive parents, it will not allow Mark, who is American, to sponsor Fred, who is French and threatened with deportation. Though the law gave them their four children, it would blindly split their family apart. Today, Mark and Fred are taking a stand. This morning they will appear before an immigration official for a green card interview, thus becoming the face of the fight against the Defense of Marriage Act for 38,000 LGBT families currently facing deportation because federal law does not recognize their union. I find their situation wrenching and their courage thrilling. Please read their story and stay tuned. For more on the DOMA Project, go here.

As they await a decision on whether 2012 will be the year their family is torn apart they have decided to take the fight to their elected officials and to the President, himself a son of a binational couple. At best, the administrative agency could choose to do what Mark and Fred consider “the right thing” and place their case into abeyance until litigation concerning the constitutionality of DOMA makes its way to the Supreme Court. At worst, Fred may be placed into deportation proceedings, their nightmare scenario. Meanwhile, the family is in a state of limbo, and it pains them as parents when they can’t answer their children with certainty about the future. They can only prepare themselves, mentally and emotionally, to fight for full equality under the law.


  1. Our country is blessed by them. Why don't "we" realize that?
    This is so awful. I hope for a miracle.

  2. This is horrifying. The Defense Of Marriage Act is one of the most offensive things that is wrong with our (mostly great) country today.

    I'll be thinking about them today, and hoping intensely that things go RIGHT for them all. Breaking up their family would be so very WRONG.

    I wish there was something I could do to help in a tangible way. :(

  3. their situation makes such a mockery of all the nonsense about the sanctity of marriage and family. i have enjoyed mark's regular presence in your comments section, and his story and that of his partner and their family is heartbreaking and infuriating. thank you for filling us in, angella.

  4. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful family. This is horrible. All around. This is what I was talking about the other day. So much emphasis on the wrong things. Look at those kids! Happy, cherished and loved. This is senseless.

    Thank you for telling us. We are rooting for Mark, Fred and their beautiful children.

  5. I am crying in frustration and hope, and have been praying so much for them. This situation is so unfair, so fucking unfair. I would walk on nails for them. I'm crossing my fingers harder than ever.

  6. Everyone here, thanks for feeling this. There's much more to come I think. CNN just picked up the story!

  7. What a day, Angella.
    As expected, we were received warmly and the Officer took great care in treating us kindly but firm. He asked all the right questions and we had an answer for each one. As is standard business, we did not receive an answer today but one will be coming. When? I don't know. But because of DOMA, we already know what the official answer will be. After almost 22 years, the stress officially begins today.
    Thank you for sharing our story. There are 38,000 couples just like us who you are also helping by spreading the word.

  8. I hope the CNN story helps them out. This situation is a travesty.

  9. Oh, what a horrible situation and yay for Mark & Fred for going public to spread the word and put a human face on this.

    I was just visiting friends who got to take advantage of being straight (they got married when her visa expired); then visiting other friends who are already married but she still doesn't know what to do when her visa expires in July (and they're trying to adopt). Frankly the second couple is so much more committed to each other, yet they're penalized for both being women. Why? Or my oldest friend, whose partner felt forced by immigration law to marry a man. They lived a sham and lied under oath so that she could stay here (then right after two years, a divorce and a pregnancy - now three children together). This is how we make outlaws? Why?

    Best wishes to Mark & Fred and all others!

  10. what a gorgeous family! i will keep them in my prayers.