We watch movies and serialized dramas. We read books. We’re riveted, compelled by the artistic rendering of human pain. We cry for the people in these stories, we cry with them, knowing from our own human walk how agony hollows us out. We can’t look away when we see life mirrored in this way. It doesn't matter that the stories may not be real, because we know that somewhere, someone is suffering in the ways portrayed. I’m thinking tonight how pain is part of our human journey. We incarnate here to experience it, because without it, how would we ever know the sense of joy. How would we ever grasp the feeling of surpassing peace. I need to learn to not fear emotional pain, mine or my beloveds. To not shrink from it. To allow it and to know—really know—we will not be destroyed by it. Into each life, a little rain must fall—my mother often said this, quoting Longfellow, I believe. Tonight, as I brood on the ineffably sad ending of One Day, the fourteen episode Netflix series I just finished watching, the memory of her murmuring these words comforts me.
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My daughter and I had dinner and margaritas at our usual place by the river last week. We laughed, we shared tender heart things, and at one point she cried, still gutted by grief. As the tears fell, I quietly held her hand, marveling at the way one can allow the rain to fall while never relinquishing the sun.
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The photo is of Ambika Mod and Leo Woodall, who play Emma Morely and Dexter Mayhew in One Day. The series starts slow, and I actually stopped watching at episode four, a bit exasperated by some of the characters' choices—perhaps I was too far away from my own misbegotten youth to be sufficiently patient with Emma and Dex's twentysomething confusion and missed cues. But my daughter and nieces urged me to keep watching the will-they-or-won't-they love story, which spans fourteen years. The series did get better from that point on, with each character's growth and story arc holding my interest till the end. I have some issues with the white lead character's family and background being fully explored and developed on screen, and the brown lead character's family and background being missing in action, but I'm still glad I stuck with it, and it certainly afforded me a good cry. Possibly all sorts of other sorrows jumped on board, recognizing their chance to escape captivity in that convenient release of tears.
This is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteLife seems to be filled with so much suffering. I know it's not, but there are days that feel that way. But there are also days that feel light and free and full of goodness.
ReplyDeleteOh my. My mother used that quote as well. A lot. "Into each life some rain must fall." Also, "Be still my heart ..."
ReplyDeleteYes, sad is the shadow that defines the light. Without it, there is no depth. You find this in our part of the world on a winter day with no sun. Without shadows, you cannot follow footprints in the snow or see the holes and pitfalls, find your trail.